Kellach Woods

Kellach Woods
Directionless
Gender	Male
Race	Hyur
Clan	Midlander
Citizenship	Limsa Lominsa

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A recent immigrant to Limsa Lominsa from an unknown land, he was slated to join the Arcanists' Guild to learn mathematics and geometry at a rather high level, but a chance encounter with some pirates allowed marauders to see his prowess with the axe, and three ales later he was instead admitted to the Marauders' guild. An extremely curious kid seeking more experiences to truly know himself.

So far, he's only figured out that he really likes highlights, earrings and lipstick.

Appearance

While before, he was just a hunky, beefy farm boy fresh off the boat, it wasn't long before it dawned on him that on Eorzea, he could be anything he wanted.

And what he wanted to be was fabulous.

He discovered make-up and proper haircuts, rather than the bowl cuts his mother always gave him, as well as jewelry that, though it wasn't extremely rare and indicative of a social status, highlighted his other traits. Under the makeup and apparel, he remains the well-toned, if not muscular dark-skinned Midlander he was when still at his family's farmstead, but a lot more expressive about his inner self.

There are two scars across his face, one going down from right to left diagonally across his bridge, and the other on his left cheek. These appeared before his time in Eorzea, due to being chased by a wild dog while in the forest. He tripped and scarred his face twice going downhill on some particularly sharp rocks. Interestingly enough, he was luckier than the wild dog, who cut himself and bled to death on those rocks while chasing Kellach.

History

Born on a farm as the second son of a family of 4 and the third child overall. Little Kellach, however, always was weak of body and often bed-ridden early on, his family often wondering if he would survive the harsh winters of their locale. His mother, however, would never let him forget that he was once weak, and often pampered him, pleading with his father to not bring the youth on the more physical tasks. Kellach's father was a taciturn man who wouldn't listen. Boys were strong and that was the end of it.

His other son, though, never having lived through the hardships of sickness, took to the tasks quite easily, enough that it was decided that he would be the one to take over the farm. That left Kellach free of familial obligations but at the same time, without much of a future. However, Kellach remained on the farm and kept at the physical activities, even joining his father's logging operation in the winters, much against his mother's wishes. Each year he came back a much stronger boy, yet she would always refuse to acknowledge that his sickness was over.

Quite recently, he has learned that there were various facts about his upbringing that were kept from him. First, that the disease wasn't exactly all that strange in this land, just that most parents choose to sacrifice the child rather than have another mouth to feed that doesn't work. Of those that decide to keep the child, few of them recover. As such, that he was even able to live and recover is quite rare. The second is the amount of time he was forcefully kept inside. As it turns out, since he had no way of seeing outside in the winters, he could only partially witness the passage of time. His intelligence not being fully formed, nor did he had any experience of time passing, he did not realize that he spent 10 years bedridden or otherwise forbidden to leave his room, giving him new perspective on why he was not chosen to take over the farm.

Hearing that the Arcanists of Limsa Lominsa were accepting students eager to learn, his mother pushed hard that he aim towards becoming one. If nothing else, mathematics and geometry would be useful skills for farm planning. At this point, however, his father was starting to regret having given the farm to Kellach's brother. Was he a good worker? No doubt, but Kellach had surpassed him in all aspects of the job, including the slaughter of cattle, whereas his brother was squeamish at the task.

When Kellach left for Eorzea, a collective sigh of relief was exhaled by all involved. Sure, his father would have loved to keep him around, and his mother would always worry, but now questions of renegotiating succession were all but solved. His mother was happy that her beloved son was going to become an Arcanist and his siblings wished him luck in his journey.

Of course, the Twelve had a much different design for him. As he was nearing Limsa Lominsa, a band of pirates seeking an easy mark soon attacked the transport ship. A few were competent but the rest were just hands that were press ganged or brought on with the promises of large riches. One of these fell, and Kellach grabbed an axe before helping the few Yellowjackets affixed to the ship fend off the threat. They noticed that while he was untrained, he'd clearly hefted an axe before and he should at least give them the honor of drinking with them once they hit port. Not wanting to insult people who kept the peace around Limsa, he accepted the invite. Several mugs of ale later, he was signing up at the marauder guild as opposed to the arcanists', taking his first step off the beaten path.

Recent News

Due to general misdemeanors, attitude problems and doubt as to whether he can be any sort of an asset to the company, he has been officially fired from XI:7.

A Postmoogle brought him some fairly bad news - his home had been taken over by Garlemald peacefully. His brother took it upon himself to preserve the traditions of their people through a journal that Kellach is eagerly awaiting the delivery from. Due to this, the trade route that passed through his home is now closed to Eorzean traffic.

Personality

He's a farm boy that's been thrust in a strange land with stranger people and found that he belonged there far more than he was willing to admit at first. He'd often looked at himself and found that he looked extremely plain in the single mirror of the house, and now he was as fabulous as can be with makeup, earrings and highlights in his hair.

Often eager to help and more importantly to learn, his experience on the farm allowed him a good foundation of life skills, but not really anything combat related. Fortunately for him, he's not the kind of guy to get involved in a fight without good reasons. His upbringing gave him a quite simple but effective moral compass : Do Good.

More of an observer, he's quite content leaning against a column drinking a mug of ale a whatever establishment would serve such drinks, be they in Ul'dah, Limsa Lominsa or Gridania.

Affiliations and Known Associates

Due to his massive wandering these days, most of his affiliations and known associates scarcely want anything to do with him.

Characteristics

• Nicknames: Kell, (formerly - may return) Pink
• Age: 18
  • Nameday: 8th Sun of the 2nd Umbral Moon
• Gender: Male
  • Sexuality: Pansexual
  • Marital Status: Celibate (?)
• Alignment: Lawful Good
• Height:
• Weight:
• Body: Well toned, muscular for a Midlander.
• Hair: Long, with highlights that change color depending on his outfit
• Eyes: Golden
• Skin: Black
• Clothing: Typically revealing... even in armor.

Likes

• Cosmetics, clothes and other fancy things!
• Rum
• Learning and discovery
• His pet crab, Pinchyshell

Dislikes

• Close-mindedness
• Wine
• Being stuck in one area
• Anyone trying to eat Pinchyshell

Areas of Expertise

• Martial: No expertise in martial disciplines, but has passing knowledge in several disciplines. His main tool of destruction is the greatax.
• Crafting: No expertise in crafting disciplines, but has passing knowledge in several disciplines due to his upbringing.
• Gathering: Botany. Passing expertise in Mining and Fishing.

Strengths

• Places great trust in others
• Far stronger than his face and mannerisms belies
• Has great learning abilities

Weaknesses

• Bad at initiating conversation due to his sheltered upbringing
• Drops his clothes at the drop of a hat
• Is self-defeating

Other Notes

Religion

Though he has an affinity towards Althyk, he has no preference towards worship of him or any of the other gods. They are alien to him, as they are the primal deities of Eorzea and thus not his. His family had a far more basic level of worship where they worship the elements themselves, often wishing that they would bless the harvest, the woodcutting, or any other activity.

When in Eorzea, do as the Eorzeans do, and he has started to adopt Althyk as his deity of choice.

Quirks

• Scratching the back of his head looking confused being 80% of his state of existence.
• He has difficulty understanding certain social cues, such as when his presence isn't desired. He's liable to stay until it is, and follow if they try to get away from him. Sadly, this is often done to friends, leading them to not regard him fondly.
• His thought patterns are erratic and can shift gears from serious to maddening in what seems like the matter of seconds. Unlike what many may think, this has brought him serious consequences.

Equipment

Book of Rites

His place of birth do not follow the word of the Twelve, and in fact, had not really heard of Eorzea's deities. Their understanding of the world lies more in humanizing the elements and honoring them as it is their due. The Book of Rites are the collective knowledge gathered by their people in order to best honor the elements and be rewarded for it with either a bountiful harvest or protection from the elements' wrath. It also details their beliefs and rituals not related to the honoring of the elements, such as funeral rites. He does not yet have this book, as he left it behind at his parents' farm.

The rites contained within are a mixture of Feng Shui, Shamanism and a Farmer's Almanac.

Heavy Axe

Hearing tales of legendary Warriors and of some that sought to emulate them. He also learned of the very heavy axes they brought to the field. Traveling the land, Kellach was able to find a suitable replica. Though far from the masterfully crafted weapons of olde, it remains far heavier than the usual axe which, for someone as lightly armored as Kellach, is far easier to wield than for someone with heavy armor.

Rumours

The following rumours can be heard about Kellach Woods.

Common rumours

• "Don't be fooled by his shy speech and pretty face, kid's been lifting and delivering some real hefty crates over at Naldiq and Vymelli's. Could probably arm-wrestle a Sea Wolf at the Wench. At least, I'd think about it before betting against him." - Limsa Lominsa Merchant
• "One moment, he can craft a rousing speech, then the second, he becomes a witless babe who has trouble stringing together coherent thought. I'm used to dealin' with unpredictable folks but this guy..." - Regular, run of the mill passerby and not an acquaintance of the Dutiful Sisters

Uncommon rumours

• "Aye. I was on the ship that brought him in, like. Once he picked up an axe, he never flinched. Not even once. And he gazed on these scoundrels same as ye'd gaze on a calf you'd slaughter for meat. I swear on the Navigator, his stare was colder than Coerthas' eternal winter!" - Yellowjacket

Rare rumours

• "Him? You want to play cards with him... Lemme tell you somethin' - you don't want to play cards with him 'cause he doesn't cheat. He doesn't cheat and yet... You wanna play 21? He has 21. You wanna play blackjack? He's got two of those too. You wanna play aces and eights, he's got too many of those too. Do NOT gamble with him. See when you walk into a bar and you wanna gamble. You walk into a bar and you wanna gamble against him... You have to accept losing. Oh, you don't accept losing and you got a friend! Marien! Marien your friend is right here! And he's a hell of a snake, huh? You think he doesn't wanna see him? You think he cares!? So, go ahead, roll the dice... Hey, look me straight in the eye when I'm talking to you! HELLO. Thank you. So lemme tell you this. When the Touch of Death comes... then he'll lay the snake out. Worry about the Touch of Death... Touch of Death... Touch of Death..." - A very, VERY drunk, impoverished and traumatized Pugilist visiting the Drowning Wench seconds before Baderon tossed him out

What PCs are saying

• "He's such a nice person -- with some talents I don't think even he entirely believes he has. He's going to go far!" -- L'yhta Mahre

Known Haunts

You might have run into or otherwise know Kellach Woods from:

• The Quicksand

OOC Inspirations

The inspiration of making a fabulous character with the muscle tone slider up to 100 is definitely inspired by Hirohiko Araki's work on JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Playing a bumbling country boy introduced to a new world is a trope often seen in storytelling, however the most recent portrayal that inspired me is Donnel from Fire Emblem : Awakening.

The extremely long rare rumor is a long paraphrase of a legendary Jake "The Snake" Roberts promo that he performed while blitzed out of his mind. Due to my finding it extremely hilarious, I decided to blend a recent happening in the character's story with it.